There was a time when I thought this city would be as far as I got on this trip. That I'd get here and love it so much that I'd decide to just re-settle and work, finish building the thing (the web site / technology) I've built, get a nice condo and start the bi-coastal life where I'm with the boys in Florida for two weeks and here for two weeks. If you've read my previous entry, you know that it only took me about fifteen minutes of walking to decide that this place isn't what I imagined it to be, and now I'm left wishing I could just wrap up the four or five people I've enjoyed of the hundreds I've encountered and just take them with me to somewhere that I can only hope is better, less emotionally taxing (not to mention less income taxing). But I don't know, maybe those places will suck, too. And if they do, I guess I'll move on. Or we'll move on.
Maybe I'm the reincarnation of the Ancient Mariner who once, many millenia ago, killed the albatross. And now, as penance, I'm forced to wander the earth and tell people how shitty their city is, and that they should stop being such dicks:
To thee, though Wedding Guest!
He prayeth well who loveth well
Both man and bird and beast.
He prayeth best, who loveth best
All things both great and small;
For the dear God who loveth us,
He made and loveth all.Well, that's how Coleridge told it, anyway, with all the praying and the loveth-ing. But it boils down to this: Insensitivity is a crime.At some point I expect I'll find a place that isn't too bad. A place where people don't accost you on the street and ask for "money for alcohol research" or sleep in every other doorway, where joggers make an effort to spit almost anywhere but the sidewalk, where there's warmth, and light, and good food, good people.... And probably, still, I'll move on. I hope it's always my fortunate privilege to wander the earth and seek out more of those places. Or, more accurately, more of that warmth, more of those people.TT
